Who the **** is this George Carlin guy, anyway?

So everyone on my friend's list is on about this George Carlin guy being dead. All these weepy, emotional posts about seven dirty words and the counterculture, and eating chocolate chip cookies on the pot.

And I'm wondering to myself... who the ****?

(Laughter)

No, seriously. I never ****'n heard of him before today. Did you?

(Laughter)

It's like the media, you know. They make people up out of whole cloth just to sell papers and spots on TV for advertisers. "And in other news, Wally Wallenza, inventor of the vibrating douche/dildo combos lovingly referred to as 'Cleaners' died today with a big ****ing smile on his face."

(Laughter)

"He was 78. Have you taken YOUR lady to the Cleaners, lately? Now, sports..."

(Laughter)

But that's how they do things! Half the time these people they're reporting on aren't real. Half the people who supposedly win the lottery ain't ****n real either. Clap if you know anyone who won more than five hundred dollars in the lottery, huh? Clap for me...?

(silence, then a clap)

Yeah, **** you! Lousy liar.

(Laughter)

I bet the media put him there!

(Laughter)(Laughter)(Laughter)